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Why the interweb is magical...


Credit to Jeph's LJ from QuestionableContent.net (Best webcomic out there. READ IT!) for this one. I mean I'm not sure if there's anything better than lolcats and Daft Punk combined. Except probably like cold beer and a baseball game. Man I can't wait for the Sox to come into town.

Anyway not much else to report. I've been keeping up my work-out routine and smartER eating habits (not quite where I want to be on that front yet though) and I just recently got my first 2 comments which made me feel great. Definitely good motivation.

School starts the 25th and I'll probably be commuting for at least the first month or so which sucks the way gas is.

Oh and my sorta-cousin from Mexico is living here now. Well he just got here and barely started buying things and isn't really settled in, but will be soon.

Oh and the big event looms on the horizon...the wedding...

Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

Today's title is brought to you by Daft Punk. Oh and today's entry is brought to you by the Letter B, the number 3, and by viewers like you.

Hooray for me. I finally got out and started working out under my own will. Not since Rugby practice last year had I hauled myself off to work out just because. I was there 2 hours and got in an hour of cardio with the treadmill and a bike and then an hour of upper-body weights. The bike wasn't too comfortable or fun, but whatever. The weights on the other hand were great. (Minus the fact that my arms feel like spaghetti right now) It does feel good to "pump some iron" with some death metal on my iPod. Rar! I plan on alternating between upper and lower body. That's usually a good balance.

Let's hope this is the start of some consistency. I'll need it especially if I want to go back to the Rugby team and slim some for the wedding which I definitely need to do.

I'll be going to go see Valery's new apartment today I think so hopefully that'll be cool. Nothing else interesting here. I'm off to rest my arms.

Woolly Mammoth's Mighty Absence

Quickly forgetting was the way I lived my life.
Try telling me your name or try telling me "don't worry".
Everything I knew would quickly wither and die
All echoes would be buried in the sound of living,
The sound of feet slapping sidewalk
That was me - treasure hunting, I would bury what I found
That was me - the gold digger, underground
Quickly forgotten was this forgetful way of life
When I left home, when I lived as if I'd died.
Sitting on a rock and doing nothing, alone for so long
In the dark I found my sight
There you name was, written large in letters bright!
And there my faith was!
"Worry not" declared the night.
In the great void of my life, I could feel the shape of what was missing
Like the way the Woolly Mammoth stands so tall and bold in our minds
I was shaking at the size of my cry
And the true love it described.
I know a new day is dawning now and so ends my holy night.
It's back to the world I go, back to little girls and shows,
and their worldly woes, all unfurling clothes.
Will I carry myself slowly enough to remember?
I sit on a dark rock doing nothing, still just crowded in.
There's the love in flesh and bones

Is it wrong I have such a man-crush on Phil Elverum? Seriously this guy writes the ass out of songs. After recently finding out he's coming to Dallas I've been listening to The Microphones and Mount Eerie and I keep finding new songs and lyrics of his that just blow me away. I can't wait for the show. All of his songs are just so haunting yet beautiful in their own way. I'm never usually so deeply into appreciating music as I am with his stuff, but he's so different. With all his songs, he paints a picture and you can almost see it. He's awesome.


Because we own the sky

I know that my life was sort of neutral and without excitement lately, but I don't think I had a stroke-scare for my mom in line for something to give me something to do.

The good thing is that the CT Scans showed nothing, so she's okay, but to go from lazily watching TV to being asked to take her to the clinic to her showing possible signs of a stroke was way too much and too fast. We spent the whole afternoon and until just now in the hospital awaiting word and thank God she's okay. I could've been there until forever just to know it's nothing. Call me a pussy or whatever, but I'm just not sure what I would do with myself if I lost her, especially right now. But good thing I don't have to worry about that.

She just came into the room to thank for tonight and it got semi-emotional. God dammit. I need a cigarette.

I fly like paper...

I started writing in this and stopped quickly after and hate it because I feel good usually after writing in this, but I guess I get lazy.

Anyway, I'm back in Dallas. Staying at Mom's in The Colony and I'll begin job/house-hunting soon. I need to find both before school starts on the 25th. Not really looking forward to it, but looking forward to starting anew. Hopefully I'll have time for work, school, and rugby.

Valery's wedding is in September and things are quickly starting to get more obvious that a big change is a-coming. I got here just yesterday and my sister is gone from the house and living in Downtown Dallas now. I'm really happy for her, but the downside is that her own life officially starts and while we'll always be there for each other and of course related we won't ever spend as much time or be as close again. Especially if I decide to leave again for grad school and to teach up in Boston. The depressing reality of adulthood continues to settle. The relationship of family continues, but the quality time and the closeness is really going away quickly.

Maybe I'm just overdoing it, but it certainly feels that way especially for me. I think subconsciously I still resent the fact that I was never able to break through that circle of my sister, our cousins, and their friends who I always looked up to. Now that I'm old enough to really take part in what they do, they're grown up and starting families and hardly have the time to sit and just breathe much less go out and enjoy an evening together. I should just accept the fact that it just couldn't work for reason out of both side's control (age) but I think I blame them. I should work on getting over that.

Actually I should work on getting over a lot of things. Dad and I got into it quite a bit while I was there. I don't know why a part of me thought things were getting better. I guess I was just naive to see he's still the same. I'm glad I've left and back with Mom. I was so close to telling him off, but the sad reality for him is while he IS my Dad, I only really have an economical need for him. At 21 I surely don't need a father figure and he seems to do nothing, but complain and continue to try and change who I am and instill values in me which is too late. I'd like to say I don't care anymore for what happened with my parents, but I'd be lying. I need to work on letting that go too.

Over the summer my mom offered me a chance to go back and see the family therapist. I danced around it a little and I guess I let time slip away, she forgot, and nothing came of it. I probably should have. It doesn't hurt to have someone who gets paid to listen to you. She would've probably helped with all the unresolved and hidden emotions I'm apparently carrying around.

It's been a long time since I've had that feeling to run away and just be somewhere on my own for a bit to really get a hold of my thoughts, but I'm having it again. Hopefully I've just had too much time to set on things and think and once life starts again it'll recess to back of my mind.

I really intended this to be short, but here I still am. Well I guess that's enough for now. If you've managed to read this far into this then my hats off to you and thank you for reading I guess.

All I Need

I am the next act waiting in the wings
I am an animal trapped in your hot car
I am all the days that you choose to ignore

Well I finally am in Houston. Been here for a bit now actually. My Dad finally got internet in his house which is good news because it has really helped pass the time.

On that note: Time, I have too much of it. And I'm sure I'll regret wasting it sometime, alas I'm sure I'll keep doing it.

The good news is I've gotten to see a few of my few friends. On Saturday Whitney and I went to It's A Grind to see Sherry's brother Robby and his friends play acoustically. That was surprisingly good. I got very into the intimate setting and the overall good music being played. They played some good songs that brought up some emotions. I miss that personal feeling from going to shows. I should find a good band playing and go see them. We then went to Chili's and hopped on over to Sherlock's. It was a good night. We had some interesting conversations. I tried explaining Neoliberalism to her while she tried to tell me the stories of Greek mythological heroes. Quite the convo you missed out on. Oh and the best one was on astronomy. I think I said "Whoa" like 10232930293 times. Good times.

On Sunday I drove out to South Houston to see Bobbi. That was fun. She looks mad different. Chopped off her hair and lost a mad amount of weight. Good for her. It was awesome getting to see her. We hit up a small Mexican joint for lunch, hung out at her pad, went to Fox and Hound, and spent the rest of the night boozin it up at her place and hanging out with her roomie and her boyfriend. I stayed there that night and came back like at 4 PM. Definitely going back to see her ASAP.

Mark should be coming in soon. That should be fun times.

Oh exciting news, I only have about 20 dollars in my bank account thanks to my weekend escapades and the obscene cost of gasoline. Definitely saved a lot more money being in Boston because I had no car. That reminds me I should call Carlotta. She called me on Saturday. Seriously though, gas is ridiculous.

Still not really doing much with myself. Like I said, I have a lot of spare time. Yesterday I actually started thinking I might go back to North Texas sooner than I was thinking before. Not sure of the point of getting a job for like a month and a half here and then having to quit and find another up there. I might just shorten my time here and head up there and start trying to find an apt and a steady job for the year. We'll see though. But if things keep going the way they are now, I just might leave.

I can't complain too much though. I'm not in school and generally feeling more mellow than usual. Which is a good thing.

I need to be more consistent with writing in this thing. I always forget how good it feels to get things out on here.

You are all I need
You are all I need
I am in the middle of your picture
Lying in the reeds

Grades are up

4 A's and a B motherfucker!

It's too bad about that B because it breaks my 1 semester streak of all A's. But I couldn't ask for more seeing as how I only had 2 grades in that class and one was a C+. I wonder how I did on my finals.

Still in the Metroplex, but I should be heading down to Houston at the latest sometime before this Saturday. Woo. Can't wait

The Archduke

So while doing a review for one of my classes, I looked up some info on Archduke Franz Ferdinand (assassination sparked WWI) and according to his Wiki page this is his full name:

Franz Ferdinand Karl Giuermo Anikò Strezpek Belschwitz Mòric Pinche Bálint Szilveszter Gömpi Maurice Bzoch János Frajkor Ludwig van Haverbeke Josef von Habsburg-Lothringen

It isn't sourced, but I sure hope it's true. How awesome/not awesome is that? Fit THAT on the back of a jersey.

On a cooler note, by this time tomorrow I'll be a free man. (from school) Woo


Snazzed this up a little. I like the pseudo-subway lines a lot. Remind me a bit of Boston. I like it.

Kingdom of Doom

And when the sunset world begins
Turning into the night
I see everything in black and white
and then

What a horrible start to my day today. It was surprisingly cold out today so I was vastly underdressed for that and add to the fact that I lost my keys. I didn't notice until after my first class and of course I have only an hour to retrace all my steps and try to find them. At that point they could've been dropped in the cafeteria, somewhere in my building, the bus, the bus stop, anywhere between the stop and my building (which is quite a stretch of area), or my building (where I sat before class, class, and the bathroom)

I'll spare the details of my sweat-inducing hectic hour I had and let's just say 3 Lost-and-Founds later, they ended up being on my desk in my room. Some guy who helped me look for them on my bus said something like "I bet they're somewhere lame like your room, I did the same thing and they were there) Sure enough, I never grabbed them on the way out. For some reason it got very overwhelming like more so than a set of keys should be. Definitely needed a chill pill. Where do you get those anyway?

Anyway I did get to class with a minute to spare. All that for a short class. He let us out early...nice but lame...

I went to my fam's this weekend like I usually do and it was nice. I didn't do much, but I did get out a little more than usual. Driving with the windows down and listening to music is very therapeutic. I learned that from Mark. Every time we'd go out and just drive around it was just nice. I don't know what it is really. Plus I got to talk to the fam themselves and that's always good too.

I'm so ready to be done with school and get out of Denton. I'm pretty tired of it all in general. Except there's a little thing called Finals. I wish I could exempt some like I did last semester. That was nice. Move out is gonna be a bitch. Not looking forward to that either.

but at least nicotine is making this all better. Well not better but more manageable.